A 38-year-old single lady who has blamed feminism for her childlessness and ending her marriage due to her husband’s demands, has spoken up.
Melissa Persling wrote an article for Business Insider titled: “I’m 38 and single, and I recently realized I want a child. I’m terrified I’ve missed my opportunity.”
She also granted an interview to Fox News Digital where she broke down crying, describing how she feared she would end up alone and childless.
The woman, who has now decided as she approaches her 39th birthday that she wants to settle down, have a family and a husband, said she felt “betrayed by feminism.”
In her Business Insider article, Persling revealed that she married a traditional man at the age of 22 and moved to a rural community in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho, where she grew up.
“He wanted a simple life with children and home-cooked meals. At that time I felt very strongly I did not want children, that I wasn’t going to be like the traditional housewife. I knew I did want to pursue a career, and I felt very strongly that that would never change. And I guess I was wrong,” she told Fox News.
Persling said she and her ex thought that love could conquer everything, but after 10 years, it was clear their differences in life goals were irreconcilable. She became resentful when he would ask for dinner or for his laundry to be done.
“I did little to hide my disdain for our small-town life. He was a good and hardworking man, but I don’t think I made him feel that way,” she said.
When she was 30, she and her ex-husband divorced.
“I told my friends and family I’d never get married again. I needed independence, a fulfilling career, and space to chart my own course, and I didn’t think marriage fit into that vision. I was content to look toward a future without a husband, children, or the trappings of a ‘traditional’ life,’” she wrote.
However, as she got older, she said the fun, carefree lifestyle, being wined and dined, and going to parties began to get old.
When she turned 38, terror began to take over.
“I was panic-stricken. I really thought I’m going to be alone forever. It really scared me. I don’t want people to miss out on the important things in life because they’re just enjoying themselves because I don’t think that that’s ever going to really make you happy,” she said.
She wrote in the article how she felt “urgency” to find a stable relationship and was rethinking about wanting marriage and children.
“I hardly recognized myself,” she wrote in the article. “I also began to feel selfish for spending so much time focusing solely on myself… My very existence started to feel shallow and hollow.”
In retrospect, Persling believed she had some self-discovery and work for herself to do, and it took time to sort through previous trauma. Her parents’ divorce, which she described as coming from “a broken home,” took time to heal and sort through to find out what she really wanted.
“I grew up in a fairly traditional family, but my parents were divorced. And I would say that probably had some effect on my feelings about having a family coming from a broken home certainly has its hardships,” she told Fox News Digital.
At one point, she recalled a man coming over to her in a coffee store who randomly told her not to lose hope – that God had a plan for her.
After publishing her story, she gave an update. She said her life took a happy turn, which she describes as the exception and not the rule for women in her age group.
